I know that every child's adjustments are different, but our Hana had a really difficult time. Particularly, I feel she knew just enough to be angry at her father for "leaving her" but is still too young to
1. understand the real curcumstances going on, and 2. to have the emotional maturity to handle the pain and confusion of all the changes.

Just at the time in a person's life when there is experimentation with independence and self control, everything was completely out of her control. As a result, any situation where she needed to relinquish control such as being seat belted on the plane home, sitting to have her hair done, getting fingernails trimmed, going to bed, etc. was a MAJOR battle resulting in amazingly angry tantrums - hitting,
spitting, biting... baskethold... hitting... baskethold...

At this age (she turned 5 six weeks after coming home) everything falls into one category or another, black and white so to speak. She
was either very happy or very angry. Things are either right or wrong. Because of this, our discipline continues to require very very clear expectations and extremely consistent follow through. There is not yet room for gray area or exceptions.

On the other hand, the joys have been incredible. It is pretty wonderful to see the look on her face as she experiences something
completely new. The first elevator ride was priceless. Memory being such a strange thing leads to some pretty interesting stories of life in Ethiopia mixed with things that have happened here. Also, it's been really neat to witness the journey of language aquisition and
marvel at how easily it happens at this age.

Somewhere I heard the addage for adoption of "expect the worst and hope for the best" and I think it's good advice. It seems like we're
through the rough part, but it was really hard going for a while. In my mind, however, I keep remembering that not only is parenting a
really tough job, but also that nothing worthwhile is easy.

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