Our second day in Ethiopia, my 11 year old daughter let me braid her hair. I made about 8 simple cornrows, going from her hairline in front back to the nape of her neck. Since her hair is much thicker and curlier than my other Ethio girls, I was pleased with this my first attempt. She-- not so much. She very sweetly said nothing at the time. But after that one hairdo, and one other simple cornrow hairdo at home, she declared, “Mom no do hair.”

Great, I thought with a sigh. I tried not to take it too personally, but after seeing pictures of the hairstyles she liked from her time in Ethiopia, I realized that the style I had done was just not ‘fancy’ enough. She was craving zig zag parts and graceful curving braids, and here she’d gotten this mom who only produced straight boring cornrows. Now, you know and I know that not all moms can produce any kind of cornrow. But compared to the virtuoso hairdos from the girls at Layla House, mom’s effort was pretty poor indeed.

I knew that if she would just let me practice, I could produce something much better looking. But for a solid two weeks she would not let me touch her hair. I toyed with the idea of sitting her down and just doing it, but I decided to just major in the majors and let her be.

Thankfully she actually WAS doing her hair herself during this time. Usually it was just a single puff ponytails. Once she did a couple of French braids. Sometimes a day or two would go in between styles, and the hairstyles got looking a little 'tired'. But when it came time to leave the house and go someplace, she always came up with something nice-looking, even if it was just a cute bandanna on her head.

I decided to give her some time -- and I plotted the hairstyle I would try if only she would give me a chance. One day when I was itching to get my hands on her hair, I decided to do her 9-year-old sister’s hair in the style I wanted to do on her: tiny alternating cornrows curving gracefully back from her forehead, sides and nape all coming together at a high ponytail in back. The style took awhile-- probably an hour and a half. But it was the best-looking style I’d ever done. I was really pleased with it. My 12 year old daughter looked at her sister's hair for 3 seconds and said, “OK, now me!” And she ran to wash her hair.

To my delight, her hair turned out great as well. She was very pleased, and I was delighted with myself every time I looked at her for days. After three years of doing African hair, I finally know I have cornrows mastered. I am still slow, but I finally feel good about my braiding technique. And I am even more pleased that my daughter decided that my braids were good enough after all!

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