Comments on: International Transracial Adoption: 5th best option? http://ethiopia.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/international-transracial-adoption-the-5 Ethiopia adoption news, information and firsthand accounts by those who have been there. Fri, 12 Mar 2010 17:04:36 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: AdoptionBlogs Editor http://ethiopia.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/international-transracial-adoption-the-5/comment-page-1#comment-1177 AdoptionBlogs Editor Fri, 15 Jun 2007 02:01:43 +0000 http://ethiopia-ado.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/06/11/international-transracial-adoption-the-5#comment-1177 Well said, Dj.<br /> Great blog, Owlhaven. Well said, Dj.
Great blog, Owlhaven.

]]> By: Angela http://ethiopia.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/international-transracial-adoption-the-5/comment-page-1#comment-1176 Angela Thu, 14 Jun 2007 19:23:08 +0000 http://ethiopia-ado.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/06/11/international-transracial-adoption-the-5#comment-1176 There has been a bunch of back and forth in the scientific community over the idea of race.<br /> <br /> In 2000 the American Association of Physical Anthropologists declared that race wasn't a clear category. And for the most part they started ignoring skin color and focused on the idea of ethnicity.<br /> <br /> In 2001 an article in the New England Journal of Medicine declared that race was a social construct. And there is only 1 race.. the human race.<br /> <br /> Human Genome Project proved that humans were 99.9 percent genetically the same. This is what triggered all these statements.<br /> <br /> The idea of ethnicity rings truer for me. I have a real Ukrainian joke posted on this blog that shows this playing out. http://ukraine.adoptionblogs.com/index.php/weblogs/ukraine-s-ethnic-groups-1<br /> <br /> The list above seems to take into account culture and ethnicity as important elements to connect to. There has been a bunch of back and forth in the scientific community over the idea of race.

In 2000 the American Association of Physical Anthropologists declared that race wasn’t a clear category. And for the most part they started ignoring skin color and focused on the idea of ethnicity.

In 2001 an article in the New England Journal of Medicine declared that race was a social construct. And there is only 1 race.. the human race.

Human Genome Project proved that humans were 99.9 percent genetically the same. This is what triggered all these statements.

The idea of ethnicity rings truer for me. I have a real Ukrainian joke posted on this blog that shows this playing out. http://ukraine.adoptionblogs.com/index.php/weblogs/ukraine-s-ethnic-groups-1

The list above seems to take into account culture and ethnicity as important elements to connect to.

]]> By: Mary Owlhaven http://ethiopia.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/international-transracial-adoption-the-5/comment-page-1#comment-1175 Mary Owlhaven Thu, 14 Jun 2007 15:30:35 +0000 http://ethiopia-ado.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/06/11/international-transracial-adoption-the-5#comment-1175 djlhutch--<br /> When I found the list, I also wondered why it didn't mention the same race different country option. Frankly I think it would be a bit easier for the child and a bit 'higher' on the list. I know that there have been times when I've wished that I matched my daughters, for their sakes. <br /> <br /> Thanks so much for this awesome comment.<br /> <br /> Mary djlhutch–
When I found the list, I also wondered why it didn’t mention the same race different country option. Frankly I think it would be a bit easier for the child and a bit ‘higher’ on the list. I know that there have been times when I’ve wished that I matched my daughters, for their sakes.

Thanks so much for this awesome comment.

Mary

]]> By: djlhutch http://ethiopia.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/international-transracial-adoption-the-5/comment-page-1#comment-1174 djlhutch Thu, 14 Jun 2007 13:55:43 +0000 http://ethiopia-ado.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/06/11/international-transracial-adoption-the-5#comment-1174 Well, as an African American/Black woman, I read the list with interest. Frankly, I agreed with the list and weeped for the losses of all those children. I also wondered where I, as a same race-different country placed on the list. That was simply ignored. Hmm, I wondered why. My child shares my coloring, race, and similar features. However, we do not share culture, language and blood-line. I chose Ethiopia because there are five million orphans in that country, without the support and semi-advantages American orphans have. I no longer wonder where I place on the list. I will simmply provide the love and parenting that any child of any race and country deserve. At the same time however, I hope to remind my child of the long and rich heritage that runs through their veins. Race continues to be a factor in America. However, Miriam should not allow others ignorant opinions and judgments to factor into your decision to be a kind, loving and nurturing child to a child of African descent. That child would be missing out on the wonderful things that you could teach them about the goodness of your culture and you too can learn from theirs. The two cultures will then become intertwined. Remember, even as birth mothers, we will never be able to defend our children enough, shield our children from all harm, nor teach them enough. All we can do is be great parents and show them the right way. All other things will follow. Well, as an African American/Black woman, I read the list with interest. Frankly, I agreed with the list and weeped for the losses of all those children. I also wondered where I, as a same race-different country placed on the list. That was simply ignored. Hmm, I wondered why. My child shares my coloring, race, and similar features. However, we do not share culture, language and blood-line. I chose Ethiopia because there are five million orphans in that country, without the support and semi-advantages American orphans have. I no longer wonder where I place on the list. I will simmply provide the love and parenting that any child of any race and country deserve. At the same time however, I hope to remind my child of the long and rich heritage that runs through their veins. Race continues to be a factor in America. However, Miriam should not allow others ignorant opinions and judgments to factor into your decision to be a kind, loving and nurturing child to a child of African descent. That child would be missing out on the wonderful things that you could teach them about the goodness of your culture and you too can learn from theirs. The two cultures will then become intertwined. Remember, even as birth mothers, we will never be able to defend our children enough, shield our children from all harm, nor teach them enough. All we can do is be great parents and show them the right way. All other things will follow.

]]> By: elissa http://ethiopia.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/international-transracial-adoption-the-5/comment-page-1#comment-1173 elissa Thu, 14 Jun 2007 00:57:38 +0000 http://ethiopia-ado.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/06/11/international-transracial-adoption-the-5#comment-1173 I wrote the other day feeling like the 5th best option but you are right, the rest of the list needs to be made #6: Children stay and beg<br /> #7: Children stay and die of sickness, #8 Children stay and end up dead, in forced labor, starving, ect. Even if we are 5th we are certainly better than the other options. In a perfect world all children would be loved and well cared for by their parents as we all know we do not live in a perfect world. I wrote the other day feeling like the 5th best option but you are right, the rest of the list needs to be made #6: Children stay and beg
#7: Children stay and die of sickness, #8 Children stay and end up dead, in forced labor, starving, ect. Even if we are 5th we are certainly better than the other options. In a perfect world all children would be loved and well cared for by their parents as we all know we do not live in a perfect world.

]]> By: Mary Owlhaven http://ethiopia.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/international-transracial-adoption-the-5/comment-page-1#comment-1172 Mary Owlhaven Tue, 12 Jun 2007 07:46:49 +0000 http://ethiopia-ado.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/06/11/international-transracial-adoption-the-5#comment-1172 I can relate to what you're saying, Miriam. I also am sceptical of the ranking. It does point out the losses that kids face. And I think it is good not to forget that. But as Jan said, the reason a lot of these kids are available for adoption internationally is bcause options 1,2,3...are not available to them.<br /> <br /> Also, even though I absolutely do have my strident moments defending our choices, the joy my kids bring to our life far, far outweighs any negative stuff.<br /> <br /> Mary I can relate to what you’re saying, Miriam. I also am sceptical of the ranking. It does point out the losses that kids face. And I think it is good not to forget that. But as Jan said, the reason a lot of these kids are available for adoption internationally is bcause options 1,2,3…are not available to them.

Also, even though I absolutely do have my strident moments defending our choices, the joy my kids bring to our life far, far outweighs any negative stuff.

Mary

]]> By: miriam http://ethiopia.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/international-transracial-adoption-the-5/comment-page-1#comment-1171 miriam Tue, 12 Jun 2007 07:10:25 +0000 http://ethiopia-ado.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/06/11/international-transracial-adoption-the-5#comment-1171 Are there studies about this method of ranking? I am a rank skeptic. Because clearly there are families scoring all 1s on the chart who are unsuccessful as families. (Success in a Maslow's hierarchy, a happy-healthy, a selfless and thoughtful people kind of way.) <br /> <br /> I understand that race carries with it cultural markers and roots are important to us as human beings, but can I admit to frustration with the weight placed on our colors? <br /> <br /> It is hard for me to fathom, and I am a little ashamed to admit this fear of other people's opinions, wrath, prejudice, judgment is undoubtably a factor in our adoption choices. I wasn't expecting that before we started our research. I just don't know if I'd ever be ready to learn enough, teach enough, defend enough. I'm afraid it would be really hard for me not to become a hard-bitten, shrill person. Are there studies about this method of ranking? I am a rank skeptic. Because clearly there are families scoring all 1s on the chart who are unsuccessful as families. (Success in a Maslow’s hierarchy, a happy-healthy, a selfless and thoughtful people kind of way.)

I understand that race carries with it cultural markers and roots are important to us as human beings, but can I admit to frustration with the weight placed on our colors?

It is hard for me to fathom, and I am a little ashamed to admit this fear of other people’s opinions, wrath, prejudice, judgment is undoubtably a factor in our adoption choices. I wasn’t expecting that before we started our research. I just don’t know if I’d ever be ready to learn enough, teach enough, defend enough. I’m afraid it would be really hard for me not to become a hard-bitten, shrill person.

]]> By: elissa http://ethiopia.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/international-transracial-adoption-the-5/comment-page-1#comment-1170 elissa Tue, 12 Jun 2007 01:44:21 +0000 http://ethiopia-ado.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/06/11/international-transracial-adoption-the-5#comment-1170 Today I am feeling like the 5th best option, our Ethiopian Princess is right now spending the last night in a home with her mother. I wonder if they are singing songs to comfort each other, I hope they are praying together. She can not stay in her home as the step father is a danger to her, how very sad this is to me. Her mother's love can not keep her safe, it can not provide for her yet her love is very real! I feel very much like the 5th best option today. Today I am feeling like the 5th best option, our Ethiopian Princess is right now spending the last night in a home with her mother. I wonder if they are singing songs to comfort each other, I hope they are praying together. She can not stay in her home as the step father is a danger to her, how very sad this is to me. Her mother’s love can not keep her safe, it can not provide for her yet her love is very real! I feel very much like the 5th best option today.

]]> By: Chromesthesia http://ethiopia.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/international-transracial-adoption-the-5/comment-page-1#comment-1169 Chromesthesia Mon, 11 Jun 2007 22:34:42 +0000 http://ethiopia-ado.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/06/11/international-transracial-adoption-the-5#comment-1169 I think it depends on the individual, just as you said, the individual child and his or her circumstances...<br /> <br /> <br /> I wonder why I am bothered by how much store people put on race. *is black and feels like an alien about this, but it's not just race, it's a lot of things* I think it depends on the individual, just as you said, the individual child and his or her circumstances…

I wonder why I am bothered by how much store people put on race. *is black and feels like an alien about this, but it’s not just race, it’s a lot of things*

]]> By: shireen http://ethiopia.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/international-transracial-adoption-the-5/comment-page-1#comment-1168 shireen Mon, 11 Jun 2007 21:04:13 +0000 http://ethiopia-ado.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/06/11/international-transracial-adoption-the-5#comment-1168 Interestingly, I have heard that the ET government doesn't view it that way. For them the loss of country, language, and culture is as great with a inter-racial international adoption as it is with a transracial international adoption, so they don't have a preference. Out of Ethiopia is out of Ethiopia.<br /> <br /> Of course the kids are coming to a society with unique (in terms of the world) perspective and history on race, one that they will have to address in some way through out their life and a AA parent could definitely offer them some skills that a white parent would have to work harder to do so. But there is incredible diversity in the experience of race in the US today, there is no monolithic 'black community' but there are many, many advantages to having loving parents regardless of color or culture. Interestingly, I have heard that the ET government doesn’t view it that way. For them the loss of country, language, and culture is as great with a inter-racial international adoption as it is with a transracial international adoption, so they don’t have a preference. Out of Ethiopia is out of Ethiopia.

Of course the kids are coming to a society with unique (in terms of the world) perspective and history on race, one that they will have to address in some way through out their life and a AA parent could definitely offer them some skills that a white parent would have to work harder to do so. But there is incredible diversity in the experience of race in the US today, there is no monolithic ‘black community’ but there are many, many advantages to having loving parents regardless of color or culture.

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