Ten years ago at Christmas time I didn’t know if my husband and I would ever adopt. We’d been discussing adoption for months, but he just wasn’t sure it was the right thing for our family. We already had four children, after all. I talked, prayed, cried, worried, and wondered. And when it seemed he would not come around I tried to let go of the dream.

Ten years ago as Christmas approached I told my husband that all I wanted for Christmas was his fingerprints, the first step in the adoption process. He asked me if I wouldn’t... more

Thanks to the people who commented and let me know that my comment button is not actually broken! The winner of the book is Melissa (4givenagain). Will you please email me to tell me which book you would like?

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And now on to some recent adoption news. This has been a year of big change in international adoption. Due to slowdowns and rule changes in various countries, most notably in Russia, Guatemala, and China, there has been a tremendous increase in Ethiopian adoption.

An article at StarTelegram.com... more

Someone commented on my recent school post questioning how I could recommend keeping school-aged kids out of school during their first months homes. I thought this was an important question. Sometimes brevity can confuse, so here's my long answer.

First of all, I am in no way suggesting you bring the kid home and then do nothing with him. If I were a public-schooling mom opting to keep my newly arrived kids home for a semester, I would simply tell officials that I am homeschooling. Not all 'school' has to consist of workbooks... more

I've decided to start another ongoing post like my blogroll one. This one deals with something high on the interest list of any family currently in the adoption process. Just how long does it really take to adopt from Ethiopia? I hope that you will help answer that question by sharing your own statistics.

There are so many variables: the agency you use, the type of child you are requesting, the speed of your social worker, the competence of your local immigration office, and the amount of time you are... more

As an experienced homeschooling mom, I've written posts and given advice privately to families wondering how to begin school with newly arrived children. I dispensed the majority of the advice ... ahem... before I'd actually adopted older kids. It turns out my ideas were partly right and partly wrong.

My instinct that it would be best to start slowly was definitely right. But I didn't have a true grasp of just how slowly to go. My idea of slow was not nearly slow enough for our new girls.

I began homeschooling a month after they arrived. I felt that I was beginning with fairly... more

A week or so ago the adoption.com blogs underwent a makeover. You may have noticed some changes when you've visited recently. One of the changes is the sign-in box at the top right corner of every page. We are hoping that will make it easier for readers to participate on this forum.

However, there have been a few glitches, especially for AOL users (including me!) Some people have been getting '404' errors when trying to view pages or when trying to sign in to the forum. The adoption.com tech people are working to resolve issues. But for now they are saying that the best solution is to clear your 'cookies'.

Many of you probably know how to do this, but I didn't remember... more

The day we decorated our Christmas tree, our girls were rather sober. They shared memories of the way their Ethiopian mom had loved to decorate for Christmas. The preparation for this Christmas had obviously stirred up sadness over their past, and it took them a few hours to get back on an even keel.

It is not only older kids who find holidays difficult. All ages of newly arrived kids may become stressed by the hustle and bustle. Even newly arrived babies may feel overwhelmed by the breaks in routine that happen with additional activities. The many strange faces and strange arms reaching... more

Our children have been taking swimming lessons for the past few weeks. I spend lesson time keeping an eye on my 3 year old in the baby pool. But I'm also able to watch my four older kids taking their swimming lessons.

Our new girls approached swim lessons with a bit of anxiety, and hung close to me on that first day. But their teacher has done a great job of simplifying and clarifying his instructions. I’ve been pleased to see that they seem to be doing well and enjoying themselves.

But there is another thing I’ve noticed during lessons. Often during the lessons my... more

Lots of parents of adopted kids get the opportunity to give a presentation at their child's elementary school to help their child's classmates get a little better acquainted with the country their child is from. This can be a great opportunity to talk about adoption if you desire, or just to share some neat things about Ethiopia.

Part 1: Show and Tell You can begin with a very brief talk about Ethiopia. Show the children where Ethiopia is on the map, and tell a little of what you know about the country. Try to balance positive and negative. For example, along with mentioning that many children in Ethiopia aren't able to go to school, you can mention the skills... more

I got an e-mail from a mom who had the good fortune of meeting some of her baby's extended family while in Ethiopia. She was grateful for the opportunity but came away from the meeting confused. The info that the agency had initially shared about her child didn't jive with what the extended family was saying. Her biggest question surrounded the children in the family. Were they actually siblings to her child? Or cousins?

She wrote me because she was concerned about how to handle this unclear information as her child grew. She wants to be able to tell her child the truth about his past, especially... more