As an experienced homeschooling mom, I've written posts and given advice privately to families wondering how to begin school with newly arrived children. I dispensed the majority of the advice ... ahem... before I'd actually adopted older kids. It turns out my ideas were partly right and partly wrong.

My instinct that it would be best to start slowly was definitely right. But I didn't have a true grasp of just how slowly to go. My idea of slow was not nearly slow enough for our new girls.

I began homeschooling a month after they arrived. I felt that I was beginning with fairly... more

A week or so ago the adoption.com blogs underwent a makeover. You may have noticed some changes when you've visited recently. One of the changes is the sign-in box at the top right corner of every page. We are hoping that will make it easier for readers to participate on this forum.

However, there have been a few glitches, especially for AOL users (including me!) Some people have been getting '404' errors when trying to view pages or when trying to sign in to the forum. The adoption.com tech people are working to resolve issues. But for now they are saying that the best solution is to clear your 'cookies'.

Many of you probably know how to do this, but I didn't remember... more

The day we decorated our Christmas tree, our girls were rather sober. They shared memories of the way their Ethiopian mom had loved to decorate for Christmas. The preparation for this Christmas had obviously stirred up sadness over their past, and it took them a few hours to get back on an even keel.

It is not only older kids who find holidays difficult. All ages of newly arrived kids may become stressed by the hustle and bustle. Even newly arrived babies may feel overwhelmed by the breaks in routine that happen with additional activities. The many strange faces and strange arms reaching... more

Our children have been taking swimming lessons for the past few weeks. I spend lesson time keeping an eye on my 3 year old in the baby pool. But I'm also able to watch my four older kids taking their swimming lessons.

Our new girls approached swim lessons with a bit of anxiety, and hung close to me on that first day. But their teacher has done a great job of simplifying and clarifying his instructions. I’ve been pleased to see that they seem to be doing well and enjoying themselves.

But there is another thing I’ve noticed during lessons. Often during the lessons my... more

Lots of parents of adopted kids get the opportunity to give a presentation at their child's elementary school to help their child's classmates get a little better acquainted with the country their child is from. This can be a great opportunity to talk about adoption if you desire, or just to share some neat things about Ethiopia.

Part 1: Show and Tell You can begin with a very brief talk about Ethiopia. Show the children where Ethiopia is on the map, and tell a little of what you know about the country. Try to balance positive and negative. For example, along with mentioning that many children in Ethiopia aren't able to go to school, you can mention the skills... more

I got an e-mail from a mom who had the good fortune of meeting some of her baby's extended family while in Ethiopia. She was grateful for the opportunity but came away from the meeting confused. The info that the agency had initially shared about her child didn't jive with what the extended family was saying. Her biggest question surrounded the children in the family. Were they actually siblings to her child? Or cousins?

She wrote me because she was concerned about how to handle this unclear information as her child grew. She wants to be able to tell her child the truth about his past, especially... more

I've been trying to figure out exactly what parts were the hardest during our first months home with older children. A friend told my husband, "Well, of course you're tired-- you just had twins! They're just 9 and 12." I really appreciated that validation -- no wonder I'd been feeling so frazzled.

For us, the first month wasn't too tough. I was fresh, psyched to give the kids some leeway when it came to behavior, and their ups and downs weren’t as extreme. But by the time month two and month three rolled around, the kids weren't trying to impress us anymore, and their emotions were all over... more

I was just thrilled to get a gorgeous photo book in the mail the other day called The Faces of Layla. The pictures were taken at Layla House, which is the children's home in Ethiopia that is run by my adoption agency, Adoption Advocates International.

The photos were taken by professional photographer Emma Dodge Hanson, who is an adoptive mom herself. The book is beautifully done and would be of interest to any adoptive parent from Ethiopia. Along with pictures of the staff and children... more

First of all, you may have noticed I've been posting a little less often lately. Something about TEN kids is keeping me crazy-busy. I wanted to remind you that there is tons of information in the archives. Just click on 'Categories' to the right to see the many topics I have already covered. There's enough info here to make a book, I suspect. If you're overwhelmed by the bulk of it, try reading just one category from the archives each time you visit. And by all means feel free to suggest new topics if you search the archives and cannot find something.

Now, on to the update on our family. Our girls came home four months ago today, and I am grateful to say that life is getting... more

An issue that adoptive families often face when their children begin school is the dreaded family tree project. Typically a school will send home a request for family information so that each child can construct his or her own genealogy, or family tree.

When a child has been adopted domestically and knows or has contact with some of his birth family, many families choose to add the known birth family into the family tree, right along with the adoptive parents. Many parents of internationally adopted children, however, know nothing about the child's... more