The other day we rented a few movies to watch with the kids. One was an older one: Snow Dogs. I'd remembered watching it a few years ago, but didn't remember any specifics about it. My husband and I sat down to watch it with our four younger (all adopted) kids.

Right from the start it was evident that the story line was about adoption, which put me instantly on guard. Some movies mention adoption in a positive light. Many do not. I could see my hubby tense up, watching intently too, trying to gauge if we were going to have to do damage control due to the movie's portrayal of adoption.

Instead as we listened and watched, we became increasingly more pleased with the... more

The other day in a fit of temper, one of my younger children threw something across the room where it hit the TV. I told the child that as a consequence he was to clean off a counter in the kitchen.

"I hate work!" he howled, distraught.

Attempting to help him regain some perspective, I sat with him on the couch so we could talk. I talked about the dangers of throwing things, the importance of self control, and the importance of learning how to be a cheerful worker.

I gave him hints on controlling his temper: take a deep breath before you say something you'll regret. Think before you act. And on and on I went, imparting pearls of parental wisdom, even though his... more

Many adoptive families wonder if homeschooling could possibly work for their child. Kids need to be around others who look like them. Is growing up in a white family-- and then being homeschooled to boot-- a good decision?

I happened across a blog called "This Woman's Work". It is written by Dawn Friedman, an adoptive mother who has a Black daughter. She talks about the thought process surrounding her decision to homeschool her daughter. Here she talks about reading a book titled Morning... more

I've 'known' Martha Osborne online for nearly a decade now. She and I were both on China and Korean-adopt email listservs in 1997 when my husband and I first began discussing adoption. They built their family through adoption as we built ours, and though in recent years she and I haven't been on the same e-groups, I've always been glad to hear updates on her family.

Martha is the founder of RainbowKids.com, a monthly internet magazine about international adoption. I found out only recently that Martha also has a blog. On that blog recently she has had some interesting discussion.

She... more

Many parents who adopt children beyond the age of infancy report that their children have meltdowns in the first months home. This isn't especially surprising, given the fact that they have been taken away from everything familiar. After all, every kid pitches a fit sometimes.

However, several things tend to make this an especially troublesome problem for adoptive parents.

Duration First of all, many parents expect the worst of the meltdowns to end after the first couple weeks at home. The truth is, it is extremely common for kids to be volatile for months. Some kids... more

During a discussion of troublesome behaviors of children on my adoption email support group, a friend pointed the group towards the following article: What Shamu Taught Me About a Happy Marriage

The article was written by a woman assigned to write an article on animal training. During the course of learning about animal training techniques, she realized that some of this techniques just might be helpful in reducing some of the behaviors she found irritating about... more

Lots of new adoptive parents report that their new kids are picky about food at first, especially kids older than toddler age. American food can be very different from Ethiopian food, and the newness of it all can be overwhelming.

Foods most commonly refused by new kids include: bacon, cold cereal, milk, frosting, hot dogs, unpeeled fruit, oatmeal, pizza, and soup. An especially hated item (by many kids anyway) seems to be cheese, especially if it has been melted.

Some people have reported that their kids will eat macaroni and cheese if berbere is liberally sprinkled on top. In fact... more

Sleep overs-- did you do them as a kid? Are your memories fond ones? Or do some of the memories of the shenanigans make you blush?

I personally have some real reservations about sleep overs. As a child, some of my most unsavory moments occurred at a sleep over in my very own home, right under my folks' noses. There was a friend there who was way more.. umm, mature than the rest of us. Jokes, words, filthy talk.

She gave me more of an education than my third grade self needed. I didn't have the nerve to tell her to quit-- nor did I speak to my folks about it. It is darned hard to stand alone against peers who are being stupid.... and difficult to expect parents to... more

A friend shared this article with me talking about treatments for attachment disorder. Internationally adopted children are at risk for attachment disorder because of the many caregivers most of them experience before homecoming. Not all internationally adopted children will be challenged by attachment disorder. The article suggested, however, that about one in five will.

The biggest challenge in dealing with a child with attachment... more

My kids enjoy playing a computer game called Zoo Tycoon, where you set up a zoo and get points based on how well you care for your animals. Each animal is equipped with its own ‘health bar’--- a little line above it head that tells -- you guessed it-- how healthy it is. If the animal is doing well, its bar will be all or mostly green. An animal on the brink of death will have a mostly red bar.

Awhile back my 13 year old was giving me grief, hassling me with his sighs, Charlie Brown-like, arguing with me every chance he got, and just generally... more